Course description

"Typical. You always mess things up." "Fluke." "Who do you think you are?" If your inner voice sounds like this, you're not alone in it, and it doesn't have to stay that loud. This course helps you understand low self-esteem, notice and quieten your inner critic, and build steadier confidence, step by step and at your own pace. It's written in plain, gentle language, and it's especially suited to anyone heading back to work or study after a break.

There are 10 sections and 50 written lessons, and each one ends with a short, practical exercise. You follow Yemisi, a mum of two in Westcliff-on-Sea, through the year she went back to study after twelve years at home: the self-talk log, her first balanced thought, a skipped class and going back, a kind letter, a photo she didn't want taken, a job interview that went wrong and one that went right, a setback in her new job, and the self-esteem plan she wrote at the end. Every section has a practice pack with a worksheet, example answers, a cheat sheet and printable tools, including a reflection check-in, a help contacts card, a self-talk log, a balanced thought record, a beliefs map, an evidence file, a boundary planner, a return-to-work and study planner and a self-esteem plan template.

What you'll learn

• Getting started: the difference between self-esteem and confidence, your safety net of GP, talking therapies and urgent help in each UK nation, where low self-esteem can come from (without blame), and a reflection check-in with nothing to add up.
• Noticing your inner critic: what the critic sounds like, a two-week self-talk log, the cycle that keeps low self-esteem going, your early signals, and stepping back from the critic.
• Thinking patterns and balanced thinking: common thinking traps, weighing up the evidence, writing balanced thoughts that are believable rather than forced, loosening harsh rules, and sticky thoughts.
• Self-compassion: what self-compassion is and isn't, finding a kinder voice, handling mistakes, writing a kind letter to yourself, and everyday acts of self-respect.
• Core beliefs, gently: how deeper beliefs and rules for living work, finding them gently and safely, writing a fairer new belief, and collecting evidence for it.
• Building evidence and small wins: your strengths list, small steps, try-outs that check the critic's predictions, letting praise land, and an evidence file for hard days.
• Boundaries and confidence with people: boundaries and people-pleasing, social situations, relationships that lift you up, and handling criticism and feedback.
• Body image, comparison and social media: kinder body talk with no talk of size, numbers or eating plans, comparison, making social media work for you, and when to get help.
• Confidence at work and in study: returning after a break, skills from time away, applications, interviews, speaking up, and feeling like a fraud when things go well.
• Setbacks and keeping it going: looking back, handling dips, your early warning signs, your own self-esteem plan as a final project, and keeping it going.

Who it's for

Adults who often feel not good enough, put themselves down, or hold back because of how they see themselves, including people returning to work or study. You don't need any previous knowledge. If you'd like to go deeper into assertive communication, the Assertiveness Skills course goes well alongside this one.

What this course is, and isn't

This course is education and self-help. It draws on ideas used in cognitive behavioural approaches, but it isn't therapy or treatment, and it doesn't replace care from a GP or mental health professional. It explains how to get help through your GP and NHS Talking Therapies, with the routes for England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland, and what to do if you ever need help urgently. If you feel you might harm yourself, or you can't keep yourself or someone else safe, call 999 or go to A&E now.

What will I learn?

• Explain the difference between self-esteem and confidence, and where low self-esteem can come from, without blame
• Catch your inner critic in the moment and see how low self-esteem keeps itself going
• Spot thinking traps, weigh up the evidence and write balanced thoughts that feel believable
• Treat yourself with more kindness after mistakes, using a kinder voice and a kind letter
• Gently explore core beliefs and rules for living, and build a fairer new belief
• Collect evidence of your strengths through small wins, try-outs and an evidence file
• Set boundaries, ease off people-pleasing and handle compliments and criticism more calmly
• Be kinder about your body and handle comparison and social media in healthier ways
• Prepare to return to work or study, describe your skills, handle interviews and speak up
• Write your own self-esteem plan, spot early warning signs and handle setbacks

Frequently asked questions